Summer Hee Bee Gee Beez

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Summer is here.  Tomorrow is the last day of school which means just like that (insert finger snap) many of our friends are hopping planes back home.  Some will return in August.  Many won’t.


The idea of our family heading home this summer is bringing up all kinds of unexpected feels.  I thought it would be pure excitement  - but along with it - is a dash of nervousness and uncertainty. 


It has been a full year since I have seen many of my beloved friends.  More than a year of our lives have gone by.  A lot can change in a year. 


I know the old me fits in beautifully with these amazing humans, but I am trepidatious to witness how much I have changed, and they have changed, as I re-enter this world.  Have we grown apart or together?  I want us to be a puzzle that still fits.  


The more I untangle these emotions, the more I have come to think the past month of really missing work was partially a scramble to gather the past me, so when I go home this summer I can show everyone - LOOK, I’m still one of you!  We can still relate!  We can talk about the things we always did!  We still have so much in common!


When I attended last week’s AdWeek Summit and past agency friends reached out to engage in the content with me, it made me feel so good to know I still belong in this world.  I was on cloud nine to re-ignite my connection to an amazing community.  It was such a high high that I attended an agency party, networked like a banshee making handfuls of new LinkedIn connections and started an IDEO Design Thinking class.  The universe even helped me out by having a friend ask me to guest blog for her on her popular site.  


As I was doing all of this, I was conscious of the story I was creating for myself as I sat across from friends at a restaurant in Minneapolis and people asked me: “So, whatcha been up to?”


For some reason, this incredible life we have been living didn’t feel like enough.  I felt embarrassed by the purposelessness of it all.  I wanted to let them know I am still one of them.  


I was also self aware of the editing I would need to do, as we sat around a table together, as I do not want to be the girl that does nothing but talk about Japan.  But in the same breath, that is my life and I wouldn’t want to hang with someone that is not being their authentic self.  Would you?  I don’t want walls up.  That’s not real friendship.  I want to be free to be me. 


Oh yes, oh yes, so much unnecessary worry.  Cause I know, just like you, the reality is 5-minutes in, after we hug tightly and cover the surface topics, we will dive into the good stuff.  And the differences will melt away and it will just be what it has always been.  No matter what paths we take, we are in love with each other’s core and that is what matters most.  


So see you in July, friends!  Excited to see you - butterflies and all.  xo